look at this goofy motherfucker. it looks like kevin sorbo had a savage face collision with james woods. note that i didnt say they had a "love child". people who use that phrase are fucking assholes

you would never get the idea he makes a ton of dough scooting around on a wheeled-up piece of wood made for little boys. hey haggard dude. yeah you with the goonish facial proportions. can you go nab me some sick air?? and while youre up there why dont you find a real job

then i think for approximately two years in the 90s people thought rollerblades were cool, and then someone splashed a pitcher of cold piss in all our faces and woke us the fuck up from that nightmare. a guy lumbering around on rollerblades makes it look like someone fucked with frankensteins shoes in his sleep as a practical joke.

what the fuck am i even doing